Nine bosses. None of them are paying rent.

“Been on the butter since Tuesday.”

Where

Kitchen counter

A big

housefly

• Only hit it when it settles

“Brought the whole family to lunch.”

Where

Picnic blanket

A big

bluebottle

• Clear its swarm first
• Hit it when it’s exposed

“Fell asleep on the coals and came back harder.”

Where

Garden BBQ

A big

wasp

• Crack the shell when it stops
• Only hit it when it settles

“Hasn’t stopped complaining since June.”

Where

Window sill

A big

mosquito

• Only hit it when it settles

“Survived four restructures. Brought the interns.”

Where

Office desk

A big

cockroach

• Clear its swarm first
• Crack the shell when it stops
• Only hit it when it settles

“Got in at junction 12. Not getting out at 13.”

Where

Car dashboard

A big

bluebottle

• Clear its swarm first
• Only hit it when it settles

“Forty years of hard water on that shell.”

Where

Bathroom shelf

A big

silverfish

• Crack the shell when it stops
• Only hit it when it settles

“Holds court at the lamp. Everyone else is a guest.”

Where

Bedside at night

A big

moth

• Clear its swarm first
• Only hit it when it settles

“Not on the list. Ate the icing anyway.”

Where

Birthday party

A big

cockroach

• Clear its swarm first
• Crack the shell when it stops
• Only hit it when it settles